Binge Reading

For various and assorted reasons, I’ve needed to access the basics – things I already know but that tend to get obscured by habit, daily life, and managing all of the above.  I’m not exactly dating at the moment, but one of the books that I picked up was the Tao of Dating, the version for the girls.  The book itself is unusually helpful.  For that matter, so is the Author, who responded to my note quickly and helpfully.  To put that in context, I rarely write an author to thank them for the book, but this was an exception.  He reminded me of some things I was in serious danger of forgetting – things I know but that tend to get lost in the cacophony of voices that have nothing to gain from me maintaining my balance.

I’ve looked at a number of the sites that purport to tell women how to catch and keep a man.  In fact, I think one of them is catchandkeep.com  Seriously.  In some ways, this author is working from much the same platform.  You can download the book in e-format, or you can get it from Amazon where it is (I suspect) self-published and twice as expensive as most other paperbacks for sale.  It is unfortunate, in a way, that the author runs the risk of being tainted by the competition.  All of that aside, I highly recommend the book.  There are a number of take-aways, first and foremost is don’t lose yourself in the process – you are the buyer, not the commodity being bought.  Second, and equally important: it is all in how you frame the situation.

Totally worth the asking price and this one comes with the advantage of being able to buy it in hard copy to write all over (which I did).  It isn’t just for dating, it could also be called The Tao of Retaining Yourself All Day and Every Day.  Worth the $40.  Every penny.  If you don’t have the money, remember this:

Hang on to yourself.  Or go with my Oma’s advice: Love many, trust few, always paddle your own canoe.

The Feminine Derivative of Thor

Over thirty years ago, my grandmother left my grandfather.  The reasons why are a bit of a mystery, given that the truth always lies somewhere in between the two sides of the story.  What can be relayed as factual is this:  My grandmother, in an age when leaving your husband wasn’t done, particularly when you were not American and didn’t live in the big amoral city, left my grandfather with approximately $10 to her name.  As I imagine it from my mother’s retelling, she stood there with her hand in her pocket, fingering that $10 bill, and she figured it out.  She didn’t die.  She didn’t starve.  Starting over brand new from her mid-forties, she rebuilt a life that included serving as a cook on Arctic oil drills, among other things.  My grandmother is a battle ax, in the best sense of the term.

My mother shares this to remind me that I come from a long line of women with, ahem, stones.  And that, if my grandmother made it without the benefit of a high school diploma, I am most certainly capable of taking a flying leap of faith and landing on my own two feet.  To quote the grandmother, “Love many, trust few.  Always paddle your own canoe.”

The trouble is that I can’t tell which is the bigger leap of faith.  I read “The Secret” not too long ago, so I guess the answer is to conjure up the right outcome by sheer will power and/or imagination and/or feeling the positive vibes.

Or something like that.  Let’s go with this: today’s mantra is “I have lady-stones.  They are sufficient to carry me through anything.”

arhythmia

or something like that.  I really wish those dreams would stop.

this is what it sounds like

Heart attack.

York Hospital.

“If I can’t fight my way into a bag of cheerios, I’m in real trouble.”

funny that

And I thought finding someone to love me would be the problem.

for sale

Regrets are included at no extra charge.

Ricky Redux

The shuffle keeps bringing it up.

Oh, Ricky

Why did my shuffle have to start with that song this morning?  Really, I have better taste in music.  If I’m going to wallow, couldn’t I wallow in something other than tacky pop confections?  Now that you’re gone, apparently it’s what’s left.

serve a paper

This all works better when I don’t look at the old photos.

Sooner or later

the twinges stop.

Right?